It's About Time!

It's about time I updated this thing! :)

Life has been wonderfully full and busy - God is doing so much in my life, in my church, and in my community, so it's hard to find time to sit down and write.

In this next season I want to be more purposeful about setting time aside to get my thoughts "down on paper".

2011 was a surprising year. I thought I might have met the guy I was supposed to marry, only to find out that he didn't really know himself or what he wanted all that well. It ended in a break-up that wasn't handled in the best way, and that was super hurtful for me. Then I was dealing with the man I THOUGHT I was going to marry, for like FOUR YEARS, come back into my life for a few months. He was seeing someone else by this time, and ended up marrying her this last July. I'm thrilled for him, but it's not easy watching someone you once loved so dearly marry someone else, even if you know God has had his hand in separating the two of you and leading you down different paths than what you originally expected.

Naturally, it sounds like I have a lot of relationships with men. Not really. That's pretty much my history right there.

I'm one of those girls that always thought she would only date one guy ever. Really, it's courtship I've always believed in, but I just call it dating because it's a more common term, and not a lot of people are familiar with the idea of courtship. Essentially, though, that's been my only experience. I've never been casual when it came to getting to know someone or spending intentional time with them. I think you can know all you need to know about someone from three feet away. In addition, I think you see what they're like more in a group setting, where you can observe how they treat others, versus how they treat you during the pursuit stage (which often includes inflated promises and actions, that will probably not be their lifelong way of treating you).

2011 was also interesting because I grew into my job a whole lot more. I won't go into it here, as it is not the focus of the blog, but I really love my coworkers and my company. My job is tough and requires a lot of brain power, and these days I also travel for my job quite a bit, so there's nothing restful or relaxing about the what I do for a living. However, I have totally seen God's favor and blessing in it, and I've fallen in love with the group of people I work with, simply because Jesus loves them so entirely much.

2011 was a lot about learning old lessons again, because I didn't learn them well the first time. I'm glad that the Lord is a loving Father who disciplines those he loves. It can seem weird talking about the discipline of the Lord, but he is so gentle with it, and it is always smothered in hope and affection. We have every reason to believe that he will not ever give up on us or discontinue the work he began in us. He will be faithful to complete it. It's a promise.

2011 was a year of intense ministry. The college and career group at my church has ballooned. Our school of supernatural ministry is kickin' awesome, and getting better every week, and our youth are going deep with the Lord. I'm also on the worship team, and what God is doing in our community when it comes to arts and worship is just AMAZING. I eventually want to share more about my personal journey when it comes to music. Someday soon I shall dive into it!  :)))

2011 was a year of making incredible life-long friends. I can't even believe how blessed I am to have these kind of people in my life.  It's one of the things I'm most thankful for this year!

Anyway, I shall write more later. :)

Ramblings from my heart

This is one of those posts you write when you have a million thoughts in your head and no idea how to sort them out.

......

Okay, two minutes have passed, and I'm just sitting here staring at the screen. I really don't even know what to say, how to begin.

Maybe I should make a list or something?

Yeah, I'll try that method...

* Still no job, though I've had a few interviews.  I'm really fed up with corporate America. Oh, Lord, if you really want me to get a job in some huge company, you're going to have to give me a lot of strength and compassion and patience and love. I just can't conjure it up on my own.

* While I've set this apart as a season of intercession, it's mostly been about me going into the secret place with God and just spending time with him. No agenda. Just wanting to be with him. No list of things to pray for. Just want to look at his face. No requests. At least, not too many ;)  Just want to be where he is.  Want him to be so real in my life. Want to walk in his glory and presence. Every day. All the time. Everywhere I go.

* The prayer torch is going to be passed to us soon. In my state, there's a grassroots prayer initiative going on that is just amazing - churches all over the state choose a week where they do 24/7 prayer at their church, and then they pass the torch to another church. We are going to be in charge of the week that lands on the last days of October and first days of November, right around election time!  That's a big thing to pray for!  We'll be praying for a host of other things as well...
Today the lady in our church who was sort of the visionary behind us even getting involved with the Prayer Torch and I got together to pray.  Some of the subjects God has placed on our heart are: justice, a culture of honor, freedom (specifically in worship and lifestyle), Israel, gathering the consecrated ones, living in holiness, raising up a generation of revivalists who live in the Father's affection and out of that place of intimacy with him pour love onto others - transforming cities and cultures and countries, as well as some other thoughts. How those will weave together and form the main focus/purpose of the prayer room at our church in this new season, we are not sure. But we are excited about it!  This time, I'm going to get a bunch of the youth involved.  Part of the impartation that I received at TheCall, as well as just the work God has been doing on my heart this whole past year, is about how I'm to awaken the Nazarites and the revivalists, passionate, radical, consecrated, burning ones....amongst the youth of my country. OH YEAH!  SO PUMPED!!!  My heart is bursting with DREAMS!  BIG DREAMS!!!!

* Someone donated $7,000 dollars to our church for the EXPRESS PURPOSE of giving us the chance to buy Bethel's BSSM Year One Curriculum.  OH MY GOODNESS!!! We are going to have a School of Supernatural Ministry right at our very church.  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

* I can't really listen to love songs on the radio because they make me feel unsatisfied with my current state of singleness. But everywhere I look I see tremendous favor on my life, and all these opportunities in ministry are available to me BECAUSE I'm single. Therefore, this IS what God has called me to in this season. I cannot live in wishful thinking about being married or starting a family or anything like that. Nope, I'm called to be single and set apart in this season of life. I refuse to mope about it!  I refuse to be unhappy and ungrateful!  I refuse to wallow in self-pity.  This is a blessing. This whole season is a tremendous blessing from the Lord. And if I AM called to be married, then that means that there is a finite season to my season of singleness, and I wanna make my Papa in Heaven PROUD of how I used it.

* Parting thought - LORD, SEND REVIVAL!

Soooo.....those are some of the thoughts swirling around in my head. There ya go. :)