Tuesday, July 20, 2010

TheCall Sacramento

Anybody ever been to one of theCall's gatherings?  It's amazing - a huge gathering of Jesus-crazed revivalists fasting and interceding for the end of abortion and a return to God.

My heart burns for my generation

One word written across my heart.

R E V I V A L 

Monday, July 19, 2010

Prophetic Evangelism Testimony

I have made a few new cyber friends the past few days (Hannah, Kala, Lacey, and Diana), and I'm pretty excited to know you guys now. YAY! I'm following your blogs and being so encouraged by your stories. It's so amazing to think there's this whole body of believers all over this country (and world), who are having their own incredible journeys with God - and to have a window into's such an honor.  Just think, I'll meet you guys in Heaven someday, and our spirits will recognize each other immediately.  :-)  Makes me smile.

Okay, so as some of you may know, I've decided that I can't settle for anything other than a supernatural, kingdom-driven lifestyle. I'm really trying to get myself out of my comfort zone, which is to talk and read about supernatural things God does, and out DOING something about it. I mentioned in an earlier post that I joined an outreach team. I got an email back from the lady in charge, with this awesome extreme evangelism manual attached that she wanted me to go over before I join them for my first time going out (since I told her I didn't really have any training and that I mostly operate under the fear of man when it comes to crazy-awesome stuff like getting prophetic words for people). It's 31 pages long and is super intense (lots of Scripture to go look up, and things to reflect on, so it's slow-going), but I've read most of it already. I will hopefully be joining them sometime this week or next week for my first time going out on the streets to do a treasure hunt or prophetic evangelism of some sort. If you don't know what a treasure hunt is, it's basically where you pray together beforehand and God gives everyone a little piece of information - and you put it together, and figure out where you're supposed to go, who you're supposed to talk to, and what you're supposed to tell them, and then you go and do it!  The person you find and talk to is the treasure.... God's treasure!

Prophetic evangelism can also be where you just GO, with no specific word on who/where/how and then you start talking to people - anyone that might be walking along the street, or sitting at a table in a restaurant, and as you are talking to them (about whatever topic, really), you start getting a download from the Holy Spirit, and he tells you what to say to them - really personal, specific words of encouragement, that you could never really know about them, only God could have shown you. This makes their eyes get big really fast, as they don't know how you could know that - and then you have a chance to give all the glory to God and tell them that it was the Holy Spirit who showed you this about them, and that he loves them and has a plan for their life - sometimes you just end up encouraging a believer, other times planting a seed into someone's heart, or sometimes you actually get to lead people to the Lord right then and there (and then you get their email and get them plugged into a great local church that will take care of them as far as discipling and loving on them goes).

Now, I've had a few experiences where I kind of got something in my spirit for someone else - and I shared it, and it really touched them, but it's only been a few times. I mostly don't trust that I'm really hearing the voice of God in situations like that. I get nervous about whether I've actually received something from God or whether I'm just making it up. I've realized I need to just get out there and do it and practice!  I need to practice hearing the voice of God so that I learn more about how he speaks to me and learn to recognize his voice when he's talking. He's probably talking all the time and I don't even realize it!

So, although I haven't gone out yet, I have a cool story to share about my little brother.

Last night, at our church's college and career group (which he and my sister and I are all a part of), we were talking about this very idea that God wants to speak to us through the Holy Spirit and give us words of knowledge for strangers and for friends, all the while loving on them, having a tremendously good work ethic, and being an example of Christ to them. If we would go up to people and say - Hey, I feel like God might be saying that (fill in the blank) - and it's not something we could have known apart from God revealing it to us - that would really impact them with the amazing and wild love that God has for them. This can be done anywhere - at a park, the grocery store, in class, at work, wherever!  It can be a stranger, an acquaintance, or a friend.  If they would see the power of God (words of knowledge, healing, miracles, answered prayers) coupled with us LOVING on them - WOW what an impact that would have on the people within our spheres of influence.

My little brother was really inspired by our discussion, and later on that night, he decided to try it out. Let me give you a little background on the situation. He just graduated from high school and will be going to Yale University in the fall. This summer he's been taking a calculus 3 course at the local community college, just because he wants to be extra prepared for when he takes calc 3 at Yale. In this math course, he got to know a group of young men about a year older than him that were seated at the same table (they sit at round tables and work on projects together in class). During this time, they really noticed his solid work ethic and his integrity. Whenever they had questions on anything, he would never give them the answer, but would teach them how to figure out the problem, so that they would learn the material. Anyway, there was also a Korean lady seated at his table who was in her 40s and doesn't speak very good English, but was going back to school to get a math education degree so she can teach someday. My little brother saw she needed help wading past the English in order to learn the math behind it all, and so he actually began to tutor her personally. The guys in the group noticed this about him, too.  Then, another thing happened. These young men invited him to watch a movie (there are four guys at this table, including my brother), and he said he was fine with it, but that if they were going to choose a rated R movie, the only request he had was that it not be rated R for sexuality (he figured they'd probably pick a guy movie with lots of shooting and violence, but he was okay with that - he wanted an opportunity to eat with sinners, but not get drunk with them, Jesus-style, you know what I mean?).  Well, he ended up going over to one of the guys' houses and they popped in the movie they'd chosen - and my little brother didn't know what to do.  Although they'd respected and acquiesced to his request that it not have sexuality in it - it was SO FULL of other things, that my brother couldn't take it any longer - his spirit was really troubled by the complete ungodliness and glorification of so many wrong things - but he felt trapped.  He didn't want to leave and have them think he was judging or condemning them, because he wasn't. But, as a result of his relationship with God and commitment to righteousness, his spirit could not handle seeing any more of this movie, it was such a mockery of all that is pure and holy!  So he finally excused himself, part-way through the movie, saying he had to get home.  He still didn't know if he had handled it right, but he couldn't take it anymore, and at the same time, didn't want them to feel condemned, as that was not his heart AT ALL.  Back at school the next day, they acted normal and like they hadn't really been offended at all by his leaving early. He was relieved.

Fast forward to this past week - the teacher gave the class an assignment with groups no larger than the size of 4.  Everyone could of course choose their own group, and the three guys wanted my brother to be in their group, since he's such a hard worker and they had really taken a liking to him.  He felt torn, however, because no one was choosing the Korean lady, and he was really concerned for her feelings and well being. One of the guys, Stephen, could see my brother was troubled, and recognized why. He said "Look, I know you're a Christian, so I know you don't want that lady to be left out.  I would be willing to form a second group with you and we could invite her to be a part of THAT group, since we're limited to 4."  Turns out, the teacher, recognizing that the Korean lady had been struggling in class, made an exception and let the four guys have her in the project group after all, even though it would make them a group of 5. My brother was touched by Stephen's kindness. He also was surprised how easily Stephen picked up the fact that he didn't want the lady to be left out because he was a Christian and wanted everyone to feel accepted and taken care of.  He realized that these guys were starting to recognize there was something different about him, and came home excited to share it with the rest of the family. He has been praying for these guys since he met them, that God would help him have an impact on the short time he had with them before he left for college in August.

Now, last night, they all got together to work on this project, which they have been working on throughout the week, and although the Korean lady couldn't actually make it to last night's event, she worked on it with them earlier in the week. The three guys though, Stephen, Devin, and John, where all there. As my brother was driving to the house they were meeting at - inspired by our college and career group discussion about prophetic evangelism - he began to pray. At first it was just a general prayer for the night - that God would be there, that the Holy Spirit would work on the hearts of these young men, and all that good stuff - just a general blessing over the night. Then he started praying over each one of the guys, as he was driving along, and started getting very specific pictures over their lives - things he did not know himself prior to starting to pray for them - and he felt God was telling him that he wanted my brother to tell the guys what the Holy Spirit had shown him.

As the night wore on, and they were working on the project, all of a sudden the HS said "Do it now" to my brother - and he knew he HAD to share with Devin what he had heard while praying for him. "Right now God!?" asked my brother, as he was sitting there in the midst of a math problem. "Yes" he felt God say.  A bunch of concerns ran through his mind - What if I'm wrong? What if I look like a fool? What if they think I'm crazy? But he knew it was now or never. He had to obey. And so he took a deep breath, turned to Devin next to him and said "Hey, I know this might be weird, so take it with a grain of salt, but on the way over here I was praying, and God told me that you have been depressed and sad and discouraged, and that you don't feel that there's any hope for your future.  But, God wants you to know that he has a plan for your life, that you don't have to be sad anymore, that he doesn't want you to be depressed either, and that he has given you a future and a hope!"  Devin's eyes got HUGE, and you could see all over his face that he was blown away - that my little brother had basically just "read his mail" through the Holy Spirit's revelation. The other guys were in awe, too. They got back to working on math. A little while later, Devin, who comes from a Mormon family but is not practicing (interesting fact: ex-Mormons are called "Jack Mormons") ventured this question: "So, how did you know all that? Were you just praying in general and God showed you that, or were you specifically praying for us?" This gave my brother a chance to explain what had happened on the way over.  The other guys just listened, fascinated. At the end of the night, Devin pulled my brother over to the side and told him that what he had said really hit home because he had been having a really rough past couple of weeks.

My brother was SO EXCITED when he got home, and told me all about it, which was really encouraging to me.  Well guess what!?  Today he got a text message from one of the other guys there, Stephen, who was really impacted by what happened - and in it he said "I know this might be weird, but I was wondering if I could meet with you and family. I want to know more about your religion."  Stephen has a Catholic background and probably doesn't understand that it's all about a RELATIONSHIP!  But YEAH GOD for giving us this chance to reach out to these guys. Now that this has happened, we have 2 or maybe even 3 guys (we still don't know what John is thinking at this point) who are interested in knowing more about a God who LOVES THEM and knows them PERSONALLY and THINKS ABOUT THEM ALL THE TIME and knows what's going on in their lives!

I am so inspired to pray like that before I meet or hang out with people (coworkers, friends, acquaintances, strangers, anyone and everyone) based on what just happened the past couple days.

And I'm excited to go do some power evangelism outreach here in my own city!  YAY FOR JESUS!

Do any of you guys have stories like that?  I'd love to hear 'em!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Dreams vs Reality

Must we really choose between dreams and reality? What if our dreams are God's reality? 
Maybe there's only one door to walk through, and the real question is, will we walk through the door, or will we stay where we are?

Further In

Deep mysteries echo secrets within my soul.
A call. A beckon. A distant song.
What is it? Who is it?
Whose voice do I hear?
And what is he saying?

Further in.

The calm, low voice murmurs right next to my ear.
I whip around, bewildered.

Who - who are you?
Where are you?
Show yourself!

Further in!

Through these vines? These thick trees?
These brambles?
But where is the path?

Trust me.

But can I?
I'm afraid. I'm discouraged. I don't have the strength.

There it is again, now a faint whisper on the wind.
I can barely make it out...

Further in.

Deep breath.
I will have to make the choice - stay where I am, or run after a Being I don't understand.
Trust a mystery greater than myself
Trust a distant song that pulls at my heartstrings
or forever regret that I didn't risk everything to follow the call.

And so, I begin to run.

Dancing Wild and Free

I love dancing in my room when it's just me and God. I can be silly and wild and free...I can just be me.

Today I put on some of my favorite Spanish worship music (hey, no one can write worship/praise music like Spanish speakers can - it's just AMAZING how full of joy and victory they are! Everything is a declaration of war over all that is evil and a cry for the tangible glorious and holy presence of God), and I just danced and danced.

It really is one of my favorite ways to worship God.  And I think he rather enjoys it. I like thinking about how I have an audience of one - and I can just FEEL him smiling over me and laughing at my antics. He enjoys me. I've convinced of it. I don't mean that in a stuck-up sort of way.  I think he enjoys all of us!  We have to recognize that diminishing who we are in Christ is just false humility. I am a daughter of the Most High God, of the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, and the Creator of the Universe. He delights in me and I delight in him!  We make each other laugh!  I would never be embarrassed about declaring my earthly father's love for me, so why should I not say with great confidence that my Heavenly father has even MORE love for me than that?

Anyway - so I danced. And I worshiped. And I had a great time. And I'm going to dance my way further into the heart of God.

I also had this thought that it would be really great to make a dance/exercise video using radical awesome praise songs about how glorious and mighty God is.  Wouldn't that be a great start to your morning?  To get up and jump around like crazy?  And burn calories doing it, jump-starting your system for the day? Fit for life, and fit for Jesus?  Ha...I could call it that... "Fit body, Fit soul, Fit for Destiny".  :-) I'll think on that one..

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Faith vs Belief

I'm a youth leader at my church's youth group. And I love it. I get more out of being there and more blessed by the kids than they are by me. Ha!  It's awesome how God can be so good to us like that. We pour into others, but we get so much more back than we ever pour.  And then we just overflow even MORE onto others, and then we get MORE from's this amazing Upside Down Kingdom thing (or as I've heard others call it - the RIGHTside Up Kingdom, because that's how it should be).

Anyway - at youth group we've been talking about the difference between belief vs. faith.

Belief is a mental agreement that something is true.

Faith is Confident Active Trust - we take an action based on that belief, and in doing so, we are acting in faith. 

So, for example, there's a lot of people who believe in God. They believe He exists. They believe He is real.

But they don't have faith.  They haven't put confident active trust in God.  They don't ACT on it.

It was a cool topic to discuss because I was able to examine areas of my life where I have belief, but not faith. For example, I believe that God heals today, that he does miracles, that he wants his sons and daughters to prophesy, that he wants to pour out his Spirit, that he wants to do supernatural things in us and through us...I  believe all that, but I don't have faith for it. Because, if I did have faith, then I would be acting on it - I would be laying my hands on the sick and praying for them to get healed, I would be going around asking God to give me words of knowledge for people, I would be walking in the supernatural!  Which by the way, if you haven't caught on to this yet - I DO want to walk in the supernatural!  I want to walk into my destiny as a daughter of God and see miracles and watch people come to Christ by the thousands, no, tens of thousands (hey, you gotta dream big for your life!), and  see nations changed by the raw power of God!  YEAH!

Through our discussion at youth group and my own self-evaluation, I realized I needed to take drastic steps to exercise faith - to put my belief into action!

I am going to be joining an evangelism outreach team in my city!  Oh my goodness, I'm terrified!  But I'm excited!!!!!  I already emailed the lady in charge, and am waiting to hear back about what team they want to put me on.  So I'm going to go out with 5 or 6 people and start getting words of knowledge over people and praying for people to get healed.  AHHHHHH!!!  And I'm going to start writing about it in my blog, as soon as it all begins. PRAY FOR ME!  :-)

Alright - that's IT!

I was reading Prophetic Evangelism by Sean Smith last night, and was hit by how Jesus and the disciples (later on in Acts) would fast...and then they would be filled with the Spirit and go out and do all sorts of crazy awesome God-stuff.

Guys. I need to fast.

I WANT to fast.

I HAVE fasted before, and it was amazing. So why don't I do it more often? Why is it always such a "special occasion" that prompts me to do it?

I'm realizing I need to make it a regular part of my lifestyle, so that I will be regularly filled with the power and love of God.

Every time I start thinking about making fasting a regular part of my life, though, I get worried....I'm so busy. I've got so much going on. I need my strength. I need to be alert. I can't just go off for a day or even a morning and just BE with God and have no food.  Or can I?

And so, I'm struggle with these feelings and thoughts, and I'm praying about it.  I need God's strength in order to live a radical life for Him. I can't do this without His help.

It's weird - being desperate about anything else in life is a horrible feeling, but being desperate for God - now that is the most incredible feeling in the world.

Monday, July 12, 2010

Prayer Room!!!!!!

My church has a prayer room.  It's not a huge room, but it does the job.  Tomorrow morning I'm going to get up early (well, early for ME anyway), and go pray for a while. I think I want to get in the habit of doing this every day of the week.  What a great start to the day, eh?  Let's see if it can hold me accountable.  ;-)  I say "you", but once again, I have no idea whether anyone has ever read this blog or ever will.  I could just be asking the black hole of cyberspace to hold me accountable.

I've decided that one of the practical steps I need to take toward living constantly under the guidance of the Holy Spirit is to begin my days with the Word and prayer.  Unfortunately, I'm quite a night owl, and have a hard time getting up in the morning. This usually means I don't have much time to get ready for wherever I'm supposed to be that day, and then I spend the whole day running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Life can get stressful just because I'm trying to do it without Jesus!  Yes, I'm definitely a very busy person, very involved in many things, but the problem isn't that I'm overly active...the problem is that I try to do it on my own strength instead of on HIS strength.  So that's what I want to get better at - doing things on His strength and His alone!  Planning my day around HIS agenda, and not my own.

I know that I could just get up and do devos at home - but therein lies the problem. I have a hard time getting myself awake and then just want to tumble back into bed.  It's going to be helpful not to have my bed around.  Ha!

This is going to be a very intimate time for just me and the Lord - but I'm going to sometimes post on here some of those details. YAY!  Let's see if it really works to go and start you day with Jesus in the prayer room. 

Does anybody out there have any special strategies they use for starting their day with the Lord?


"Son of man, I have made you a watchman for the house of Israel; so hear the word I speak and give them warning from me."

Ezekiel 3:17

 5 As a young man marries a maiden,
       so will your sons [a] marry you;
       as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride,
       so will your God rejoice over you.
 6 I have posted watchmen on your walls, O Jerusalem;
       they will never be silent day or night.
       You who call on the LORD,
       give yourselves no rest,
 7 and give him no rest till he establishes Jerusalem
       and makes her the praise of the earth.

Isaiah 62:5-7

5 I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
       and in his word I put my hope.
 6 My soul waits for the Lord
       more than watchmen wait for the morning,
       more than watchmen wait for the morning.
 7 O Israel, put your hope in the LORD,
       for with the LORD is unfailing love
       and with him is full redemption.

Psalm 130:5-7

Sunday, July 11, 2010


I don't have a job.

But I know that I need to trust God.

This is part of the surrender process that I'm going through.

Do I believe that God has a plan for my life and that this includes what my first job out of college will be?


This is a faith struggle for me. At times I'm completely confident, at other times I'm scared and worried.

That's when I have to drop to my knees (which I've literally been doing that a lot lately, as I find it helps me concentrate on really connecting with God through prayer), and just surrender. I have to be able to say - "Alright God. This freaks me out. Yet I trust you most of the time. Help me trust you ALL the time! Please, guide me."

I can't wait to tell you what comes of this surrender process. I really want the right job. I really want God to plant somewhere where I can ambush coworkers with His love! 

I'm also trying to pray as I write my job applications, and pray as I turn them in, and pray as I receive a phone call or am granted an interview.

I've had one "pre-screening" call so far, and maybe they'll call back this week for an interview. We'll see!
God - give me faith and strength to see this through!

Do you trust God with your job and career? Does God really care what we do as far as work goes?

The Sabbath

Hi folks (I don't know if I actually have any readers yet, or if I'll ever have any, but hey, I'll pretend I have an makes things more interesting),

I recently graduated from college (May 2010) and am still looking for a job. I majored in business, but my free-spirited self hopes to take it into a nonprofit/missions direction someday. 

During my five years of college, and really all of my life - I have studied hard and have rested very little. I didn't come from a family that observed the Sabbath, or even a Sunday version of it, and sadly, I think that most Christian families don't observe the Sabbath it's not like I've been very exposed to many people who consider a whole day of rest once a week to be an important part of their Christian life.  We Christians certainly don't know how to rest any more than the world does.  In college, I worked myself to death. I didn't know how to relax. In fact, I often felt guilty if I had any fun, or watched a movie, or spent too much time chatting with friends.  I ended up being tired and stressed through most of college, something my personality wilts under.  But then, what personality LOVES stress?

I'm still trying to find that balance, but what I loved about church today is that my pastor talked about how the Sabbath is about observing the spirit of the law, not the letter of the law. He spoke out of Mark 2:23- 3:6. Jesus said that the Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. God created the Sabbath because he LOVED his people, and wanted them to rest at a time where every other nation was working 7 days a week. God created the idea of a "day off", or the "weekend off".  He basically started a whole nation in sync with resting after 6 days of hard labor. But the Pharisees (which, we all have a bit of Pharisee in us, so there's not too much judgment coming from me) were horrified at how he healed on the Sabbath and how he allowed his disciples to basically feed themselves by picking grain on the Sabbath, and so they decided to consort with the Herodians, who were FAR WORSE than Jesus when it came to breaking the Sabbath! The Pharisees hated the Herodians!  What were they thinking!? They must have been THAT angry.

So it got me pondering the subject of how much God loves us and is looking after us, and wants us to take time to reconnect and relax and rejuvenate after we've put in some serious work. He wants us to spend time with Him and enjoy Him! I think there is blessing in that, and I really missed out in college by not picking a day to observe as the Sabbath, whether the traditional Saturday, or the Christian Sunday...or some other day. Hmmm. Welp, I can't go back and fix the past, but I can certainly start taking it seriously now.  I think I shall try out some Sabbath-resting come this next Saturday. :-)

Lord of the Sabbath
 23One Sabbath Jesus was going through the grainfields, and as his disciples walked along, they began to pick some heads of grain. 24The Pharisees said to him, "Look, why are they doing what is unlawful on the Sabbath?"  25He answered, "Have you never read what David did when he and his companions were hungry and in need? 26In the days of Abiathar the high priest, he entered the house of God and ate the consecrated bread, which is lawful only for priests to eat. And he also gave some to his companions."
 27Then he said to them, "The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. 28So the Son of Man is Lord even of the Sabbath."

Mark 3

 1Another time he went into the synagogue, and a man with a shriveled hand was there. 2Some of them were looking for a reason to accuse Jesus, so they watched him closely to see if he would heal him on the Sabbath. 3Jesus said to the man with the shriveled hand, "Stand up in front of everyone."
 4Then Jesus asked them, "Which is lawful on the Sabbath: to do good or to do evil, to save life or to kill?" But they remained silent.
 5He looked around at them in anger and, deeply distressed at their stubborn hearts, said to the man, "Stretch out your hand." He stretched it out, and his hand was completely restored. 6Then the Pharisees went out and began to plot with the Herodians how they might kill Jesus.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Ani L'Dodi V'Dodi Li

There is a ring I have wanted to get for a few months now - to symbolize this new season that the Lord has brought me into.

It comes from This is a site primarily for Jewish people, and although I'm not Jewish, I have such a love for that people group and for the country of Israel. But there's other reasons for why I want this ring.

1. It's sort of a purity ring - not only does it symbolize waiting for my future husband, but it symbolizes my betrothal to Jesus. He is my forever bridegroom! Iwant to remain pure from the idols, things, pursuits, and entanglements of this world. I am set apart for something greater. Jesus himself is my destiny! My marriage to the King of Kings! Ooohhh....just thinking about it gets me so filled with hope and excitement and love! I can't wait to meet him face to face!

2. Another thing I love about it is that it's in Hebrew. I wish I could read Hebrew, but I can't (yet!). However, I do know what this ring says.

In Hebrew, the words "Ani L'Dodi V'Dodi Li" are inscribed on the surface of the ring, and that phrase means: I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine (from Song of Songs, one of my favorite books of the Bible!).

3. It will open up opportunities for me to talk to people about who Jesus is and what he has done in my life.  I can't wait!

I don't have any money for it yet (this isn't the exact ring I'm going to get, but a nice one will cost around $70, which is a lot of money for me right now).

One last thing - I might actually get a different inscription on it, one that comes from Hosea... "I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion." Hosea 2:19

I love that! I will probably get that first part, "I will betroth you to me forever" as an inscription on the inside, while keeping "I am my beloved's and he is mine" on the outside, or I might do it the other way around.

Anyway, these are just thoughts.

Do you have anything special in your life that symbolizes something about you and God?

Absolute Surrender - But How?

What would it look like it a 20 something year old girl completely lived by the Spirit. What would happen to her life? What would happen to the people around her? How would it change her? How would it change the world?

I'm on a journey. A journey toward discovering all I was ever meant to be in Christ.

I have decided to absolutely surrender my life to Christ.

What that looks like, I don't know.

I'm not even sure I know how to do it.

Scratch that. I know that I don't know how to do it.

But something within me is calling out to the realm of the unseen. Something within me wants to reach out and pull down Heaven and bring it to Earth. Something with me is being awakened and unlocked.

My Bridegroom is coming, and I want to be ready. I want to step into my destiny - I want to step into all that God created me to be.

So my question is, dear reader, what are the practical steps toward a life of "absolute surrender"?